Recently an old friend asked me what were some things she should think about and do before getting married. She thinks her long-term boyfriend is preparing to ask THE question. Her biggest fear is not a lack of trust or love – it is a lack of positive relationship role models in her life. She comes from a family that has a history of divorces, settling, adulterous relationships and just plain unhappy couples.
While I do not consider myself a “veteran” wife, after (almost) nine years of marriage, I can honestly say that communication (ie – listening AND saying what you mean in a clear way), sacrifices on both parts, and a clear understanding on finances makes a world of a difference.
Yes, I recall the advice to never go to bed angry (has anyone successfully done this?) or have date nights monthly when we were celebrating our reception and my bridal shower, but as we got seriously serious it would have been great to have someone share things to think about before even saying “I will” when the man of your dreams gets down on one knee.