I am the first to admit, my children are spoiled. I absolutely go out of my way to give them just about everything they want… now.
My children are now 21, 19 and 16. I am free to spoil them without guilt thanks to all the no’s I gave when they were growing up. I had the desire to give them everything they asked for all of their lives but I made up my mind to just say no.
With these no’s three things were accomplished:
- It made them more thoughtful about what they asked for.
- It taught them the satisfaction of delayed gratification.
- It prevented stress for me during the lean years.
Your children measure how much you love them by the amount of love they receive. Say no in the early years and your yes won’t be taken for granted later nor will your no be resented.
Although I used a parenting scenario ‘just say no’ works in all relationships. You can’t always give a yes to anyone. It opens the door to being taken for granted and used up. Just like with children, a no will cause people to consider what they ask you before asking, they will appreciate your yes and maintain respect for you. Feelings don’t count because nobody likes to be told no.
Keep in mind this is not social media, it is life. It is not how many likes you get it’s about how effective you are in using your gifts and talents.
Take a deep breath and just say no!